Making a new friend doesn’t always end in a way you want

Meeting someone new always seems to be great. You become friends with one person but down the road that person turns into something completely different.

Maybe, if you’re like me, you don’t have a lot of friends so when you make a new friend you only see the good. It makes you feel like you can’t choose friends because they always seem to turn out to be someone you don’t want to be associated with.

When we became friends everything seemed great. We got a long so well, and hanging out was fun. We started hanging out more and more. Like I said before, for me, I didn’t really have any friends so making a new one was amazing. And maybe this is why my eyes were really never completely open to the kind of person this new friend really was.

I find myself making new friends only to get annoyed and pulling away from them. I always thought it was me, my mental health throwing curve balls. I blame my mental health on a lot of things, it’s amazing that I even figure out what is me and what is someone or something else.

Our kids made a connection right away. They loved playing with each other and became really close. I became really close to them, as if they were my own. And I thought my new friend had developed a connection with mine.

We did everything together. It felt like I had finally had a good friend.

I look back now and can see how I was slowly changing. I didn’t realize it at the time but I was becoming a mother and wife I didn’t want to be. Funny how you can never see the change until it’s to late.

I hear so many things that are going on with my new friend but push them aside, after all I know how it feels when people start rumors about you. Turns out it wasn’t rumors.

It makes me want to cry knowing what those kids are going through and no one will stand up for them. Then again how do you stand up for someone else’s kids against their own parents?

I feel helpless. What can I do to help these kids who are in my heart? I wish I could just steal them away. Show them how parents are suppose to treat their kids. How does one just stand by and let horrible things happen to their kids?

What do you do when you want to throat punch your “friend” but don’t want to cause bad blood in fear of them never letting their kids play with yours? Do you suck it up and “play nice” So your own kids don’t suffer?

I wish I knew the answer. I wish I knew how this would all end.

We may encounter many defeats but we must not be defeated.-Maya Angelou

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